Single-ness

So today's Valentines day... and like many out there I'm spending it alone...
OK not completely alone because I will be spending half the day with my mom, but then she has to go babysit, and I do not want to go with her....
so yeah...
hmm I think I'm going to put up the poem I wrote for valentine's day in my Spanish class now...
its in Spanish.. so if you don't know spanish, I'm sorry, I feel too lazy to translate it.
here goes,
its called Recuerdos y Huellas (Memories and Scars)

Recuerdos y Huellas

Todo empezó como una amistad

Pero pronto mi amor floreció.

Llego el día que me dijiste tu verdad,

Y mi corazón agonizó.

Empezaron los recuerdos de dolor.

Mil pedazos extraviados

Que el tiempo parece no poder encontrar o reparar.

Ocupas lo más profundo de mis ser.

Quisiera poder arrancarte y olvidarte.

Pero con mi corazón terco y rebelde,

Permaneces en mi mente.

Eres mi amor inalcanzable.

Tan distante e ignorante.

Inconsciente a mis sentimientos.

Un amor tan doloroso que me hace enloquecer.

Miles y miles de huellas de amor.

El olvido es algo difícil

Acompañado de soledad.

Fingiendo estar bien, siempre sonriente, nada me pasa.

Mientras participo en una batalla que estoy tratando de vencer.

Pero al final, llena de cicatrices, agonía,

mil lagrimas ocultas,

Mi corazón solo tendrá recuerdos de dolor.

love...

love...
its so easy to feel it.. but hard to stop feeling it..
when you love somebody, you think about them every second of every minute of every hour of each day of each week, month, year of your life........ when u see them, u get butterflies in you stomach, you get nervous, you get happy, when they touch you, electric currents rush through your body, every compliment, every word of praise means the world to you, while every word of hate is like a dagger that cuts you heart. a hug, a kiss on the cheek, a brush of hands, any sort of contact with the one you love makes you get a shade of rosy pink in your cheeks. But if they reject you, tell you they don't want to talk to you, or see you, that makes a cut, deep within you heart... BUT YOU STILL LOVE THEM
now.... how do you stop loving somebody? how to take the feelings you have for them and rip them from your heart?
how?
if love is supposed to be something beautiful, how can it possibly hurt so much?
when it is not reciprocated....
when they do not love you...
when they are oblivious to you true feelings.....
what can you do????
how can you stop them from subconsciously hurting you?
how can you appear to be fine, when on the inside you are in agony, dying from the pain that they cause....
you try to stop loving them....
tell yourself that feeling love for them causes pain..... that it hurts deep inside, but you heart doesn't have a mind, only feelings, you can't teach it to stop loving.. and it hurts....

so how.... do you stop?
YOU STILL LOVE THEM.... in spite of the pain...

EARTHQUAKE!!!!

Hey peeps!!! i finally found time to write a post.. :]

ok!!!.....soo..didja feel the earthquake today, Tuesday the 29 of July!!?!?!?!?!?

I DID!!! I surprised myself because i stayed calm..but it still scared the s**t out of me... so.. therefore i have decided to tell you all about my experience at 11:40am or w.e it was...

I went with my friend and her little sister today to help their mom organize her classroom at a school in South LA. It seemed to be all good..we moved books, made a sign with paint (orange paint to be precise.. :]) and my friend and I cut out some letters for some signs with these really cool machines( I get entertained easily)... so as I was saying... during all this time my friend's mom was at different meetings , but she cam to check on us frequently.

So.... when all her meetings were over..she came back to the classroom and we hung out and did a bit more organizing. Then... all of a sudden... the room started to shake...

Since we were on the second floor, we thought it was somebody running or pushing along a heavy cart..but we were WRONG!!! My friend's mom rushed to the door because she didn't know what exactly was causing the shaking... my friend, her little sister, and I went to the door too, and then my friend's mom yelled..

"OH, THIS IS A REAL ONE, GET UNDER THE DESKS YOU GUYS!!!!"

My friend started to panic, she tried to go out the door and out of the building but her mom shoved her back inside and yelled, "No, go under a desk!!!" So then, we all ran under a desk, my friend was so scared that she didn't even go thought the opening on the side, she went trough two desks (this school is an elementary school so the desks are set up in pairs facing each other with chairs on opposite sides and small opening in between the legs of the tables [desks])... my friend threw herself between the small opening in between the desks, I just pushed the chairs out of the way and got under the desk next to where she was.... Her little sister and her mom got under the desks that were a few feet away from us...

My friend started to hyperventilate... meanwhile I was calm and I was trying to calm my friend down. She sounded like she was laughing and crying, but she was actually just really freaking out. Her little sister was also freaking out but not as much, and their mom was even more calm than me (of course, since she is a teacher and an adult)...

So as I am trying to calm my friend down, the big shake hit and we got really freaked out, then it was over, but there were aftershocks... the floor in front of me looked like it was moving from side to side. This all seemed to be in slow motion and it seemed surreal.

When my friend's mom said it was safe to get out from under the desks, we got out.. My friend's little sister and I went to get our things because we thought we were just gonna leave the classroom and not come back, but her mom said to just drop it and go out to the blacktop. While we were exiting the classroom, the first thing that came to my mind was my mom, and my phone rang. It was my mom making sure I was OK. Then I thought,

"Oh, so now all those earthquake drill came in handy!!"

We went out to the blacktop we all the little kids were lining up and their teachers were taking role. Then the principal said to stay calm and stay quiet because we were going to wait for a while just in case there were stronger after shocks... Then she announced that the earthquake had been of 5.8 at the epicenter, which actually turned out to be 5.4

M friend's mom went to talk to other teachers and the principal and we were sitting by a bench behind a backstop. We were all trying to take in what had just happened, and my friend, who was sitting next to me, showed me her hands, she was shaking like mad. I tried to calm her down but soon after the panic hit me and I started to shake too.

A couple of minutes later, after I had been trying to call back my mom, and I had been trying to contact all my friends to make sure they were fine (which was not possible at the moment, considering the fact that all my calls failed to go through) we went back to the classroom, we all got our stuff and left to go to my friend's house.

In her mom's car, I was finally able to call my mom and text my friends.... Two of them replied saying that the earthquake hadn't been that bad, that their furniture just shook a bit, but i thought differently.

So, after I got home I was thinking to myself,

"Boy, I am glad I didn't stay home alone today, I would have most definitely panicked!!!.. Huh... We'll this will be a day I will never forget.. July 29, the day of the strongest earthquake I had felt in my life so far.. this day was everything but boring.. the earthquake added a little excitement to my summer... ha ha!"

Boredom

Hi people...

Today the topic of my blog is BOREDOM!

So lately I have been very very very bored. It is actually kinda weird because summer is supposed to be fun and entertaining and stuff, but my summer has been everything but that.

The first week of my summer vacation was okay, like I said in the previous post. I volunteered the whole week. Thursday was a pretty fun day because we had a campfire at the camp, during which the cub scouts performed hilarious skits. The only kind of lame thing about the whole campfire idea was the fact that there was absolutely no fire (ha ha).

I have been thinking about what I will do this summer besides volunteering at a couple of places and doing my summer homework, and all I have ended up with have been a hurting brain. Come to think of it, it is quite hard to plan activities to do during summer, when you are not really allowed to go places with your friends, without having to go through a whole questionnaire first. I really wish my mother was not so overprotective of me, because that gets extremely annoying. I could probably ramble on and on about how much I hate being overprotected(?), but I won't because I can't really do much about that and it would just be a waste of my time.

Now, I have also been thinking that I will probably have an extra period next year of h.s. I think I might decide to take band as an extra elective. This was actually something I wanted to do my first year of high school, but I couldn't because of numerous reasons. It would actually be very cool to get to play my flute again. But there is a catch to this whole deal, I haven't touched my flute in over a year. I would have to dedicate a great amount of time this summer to practicing my flute, again...( I'm not to fond of practicing...I think I do just fine without it...but that's not true).

OK, now that I have gone from talking about boredom, to an overprotective mother, and playing my flute, i believe I shall end this post with a random quote:

"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." -Dorothy Parker

Well maybe not so random, but it is a good quote anyways...

Peace out!!!

my first blog...ever

ok...so here i am writing my first post ever and i am thinking to myself that this is the first time i do something like this...it seems pretty fun and it will b a way to put down my thoughts and share them w/ everybody.

so...hmm..what to say....well uhh...i have been out of skool for about a week now...the first week of my summer vacation was fun but very tiring...i went to volunteer at a cub scouts camp...got to try archery, bb guns...but during all that time i had to look after a group of little kids...who were quite energetic, funny, but didn't always listen... overall that was pretty kewl

uhh....i don't know what else to say rite now besides thinking that i am currently sorta heartbroken...reasons not to be mentioned....and i will probably spend this summer somewhat busy..but bored...

until next time...ill try to think about something more interesting to write...

bya! peace out!